Fear and Loathing in Church Council

Let's say that there was something that could happen... something you'd experienced before that was challenging, difficult or scary... something you knew had the potential to happen again, but which you prayed and hoped would not.

And then it didn't.

Like a devastating storm bearing down on your house that suddenly lifts and dissipates on a gentle breeze. It doesn't mean that another storm will never come your way, but this one, THIS storm passed, and nothing bad happened. What would you do? Would you shout for joy? Would you say "Amen" or "Thank you Jesus!" or "Praise God!"? or ANYthing that shows a grateful heart for the faithfulness of God??? And if you did all those things and someone told you not to get excited, what would be your response?

WHY ARE WE NOT EXCITED??? When something isn't going well, we ask God WHY, and to help us, and when something goes right, we question it... something quantifiable must have transpired to CAUSE this. We look for numbers, for data, for reasons why the bad thing didn't occur, looking to make sure that it isn't still lurking in the closet waiting to surprise us with some kind of horrific terror. We look for ways to credit ourselves and debunk any action that might be considered divine. We ask God for help every day, and when we receive it, invest far more energy in downplaying the goodness of it and trying to find the error, than in thanking our merciful Creator for life-affirming moments of faithfulness in action.

God is Good, All the Time; All the Time, God is Good.

When we bring fear to the table, then we begin to loathe, instead of love, the work of Christ's church. Fear divides and faith unites. God has a love enormous enough for all of us, if we hear it, and live it.

Thank you, church family for being there for me. I really love being a part of this family. I am excited for all the new things to come. I'm inspired by your creativity. I am humbled by your dedication. I am uplifted by your laughter. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Wisdom, Old and New.

My grandmother used to say to us “Have I told you lately that I love you? Because I do.” I've been thinking about how important that was. And still is. Grandma heartily, and sometimes very plainly disapproved of things that we did when we were small... and when we were grown. I suppose though, there's a lot more room to understand the context of that disapproval when it comes from someone who loves you, and always did, from before you were born til she stepped off this mortal coil. And who took the time to tell you so regularly, both with clearly understood actions and plain words. What a gift we can give to children! Has it ever been said that a child was hugged too much? Too often told that they were precious and loved? What is the worst that could come of that? My son a few months ago remarked of a baby he had never met, the child of a person he had never met, but upon who's picture we were looking “She is important to somebody.” I want that sensitivity to the gentle spirit that dwells within each of us to always, ALWAYS be a part of the way he looks at the world. I fail at it often myself, so I don't know if I will be the best teacher. Maybe I'll just have to learn this from him instead. Perhaps the best I will be able to do is love him, and hug him and tell him every day that he is precious to me. In plain words tell him when I approve and when I disapprove. Practice forgiveness he can see, and hope that it is enough to flourish the gentle spirit in him that recognizes already the value of another child of God.

Dreams, and Goals, and Resolutions, Oh My!

Just a short post... Everyone is still so fresh and resolution-y right now... I just want to ask... How will this year be different?? If I start with myself, and move out in faith, how will my 2010 be different and better than the year before?

Makes me think of one of my all time favorite quotations:
"The place to improve the world is first in one's own heart and head and hands,
and then work outward from there."
— Robert M. Pirsig

In what ways do you hope to grow and change as a person of faith in the next year? How do you resolve to start that work in your own heart, head and hands?

In what ways do you want to see our church community do the same?
How do you begin to move outward with your faith?

What do you resolve to do differently, better or more of in your faith year?
How can we improve the world by improving on ourselves?

These are to me, frighteningly elementary, and simultaneously grandiose questions.
I'm looking forward to your answers and thoughts, dreams and hopes.

You know what? I felt the love tonight. I'm ready to work past the pain and grow in faith. Conflict and despair can jump start harmony and dedication and not always lead to decay. Not no, but how. Not who's gonna do it but what can I do. Moving on, looking forward, listening and looking to God. I am overflowing with joy sharing a meal with the brothers and sisters of my church family and am in awe of their talents. You are all a blessing to me!